Sickipedia

Cliff Richard wants to disassociate himself from certain charities so people don't get the wrong idea about him . He will be pulling out of children in need this week .

Looks like Matt Hancock managed to get the 2 metre rule down to minus 4 inches

Heard Gary Rhodes is being cremated. My tip to the funeral director would be 160c for about 2 hours turning every 30mins

The teacher asked the class to write an essay about an unusual event that happened during my the past week. Little Johnny got up to read his. It began "My daddy fell in a well last week." Good grief! the teacher exclaimed. "Is he OK?" "He must be," said little Johnny. "He stopped calling for help yesterday."

It has just been revealed that, due to cancer, Debbie McGee has had her tit removed. That has come as a shock. I thought he died in 2016.

When Chuck Norris goes to IKEA his furniture is already assembled

Apparently if you play Adele's 30 album backwards it sounds less depressing

Elton John: “There are very few bits of me left.” ...that haven’t been touched by a cock?

Hello Markrees my fucking bestest friend Youre alright with me son. Im the the poet laurete..fucking to right i am Lucy Worsley had a little Lamb, And she called it Nash, Lucy wore a cheerleaders skirt, So the Lamb could see her gash. PHOOAR!

I’m a Celebrity star Mo Farah faces locusts, fish guts and maggots in trial.....I assume Heston ‘Blowfeld’ Blumenthal is doing the catering then?