Sickipedia

Hurt my cock in the bath last night. I knelt on the fucker . . .

A bloke goes into a library he says "Have you got a book about micro penises". She replied " let me see if it's in " He said "yes that's the one " Ta Porksword2b

Cross-Eyed circumciser gets the sack.

Confused about your gender? The answer is simple, look in your pants. If there is a penis there, you're a man. See, not confusing at all.

It's so cold, I had to stick my finger up my arse just to poke my willy out!

It's been 4 weeks since Christmas and I'm still finding glitter under my foreskin.

Me dont like to brag about me size, but when me poke the wife, she has to be in another room .

I always get my tinder profile written by an estate agent, so they can overestimate the size of my penis....

A bloke has just got out of a time machine and forced me to suck his cock, I felt degraded and humiliated. When I get older I am going to build a time machine, go back in time, find this twat as a kid, and force him to suck my cock.

At a stag do in a foreign clime the Stag's mates tell him they have organised for the finest escort in the country to take her from behind. As she has now become a media star she now only worked occasionally and had certain rules. The stag was told he must not talk to her and cant touch her, except for his dick, obviously. She is also quite kinky as she will only take it when the man in kneeling down behind her, wears a blindfold and the whole act takes place in a public car park. The Stag agrees to all these odd requests as he knows he is in for the fuck of his life. During the fuck in the car park as his mates stood around jeering, the stag did get to wondering quite why it seemed such a hot and steamy experience. She wasn't exactly the tightest either, but he reckoned she must have been getting on a bit.Still it was a great fuck, the old model seemed to roar and do amzing things with her constanly vibrating fan. Several week later the best man handed the stag a bill from for "Extra cleaning services". "What's that about ?" the Stag "Well" replied the best man "The owner of the classic car rental agency said that his Mark III escort came back in a disgusting state, some nutter had fucked the exhaust"