Sickipedia

"You're as useful as Anne Frank's drum kit" . "You're as useful as..." . Answers in the comments. Bonus cookie to the best. (You have to collect)

I have been a member of Sickipedia for round 5-8 years. I often find the jokes with modern day cultural or political references difficult to get as I have been living in Okinawa for almost twenty years. Especially "celebs", I mean who the fuck is Kardashian, Gemma Collins, Kanye, and so many more? Maybe it's a more peaceful life not knowing who they are. Anyway, to give you a taste of my angst at not understanding the higher scoring jokes and memes, here is a Japanese joke for you (if it scores more than plus 3, I will buy you all a sushi roll). Why did Oda Nobunaga feel obliged to attend Minamiza Kabuki theatre in Gion,?" He just couldn't say "Noh"!!! [get it?! couldn't say NOH!!"]

How to administrate a Joke website 1/ Limit number of down votes to 5 per day, per user 2/ Limit number of upvotes to 10 per day, per user 3/ Identity repeat users by IP address, MAC address, device type, and browser type. If they’re the same with different login email addresses, then block them permanently. 4/ If the same 2 or 3 users are repeatedly upvoting the same jokes and down voting lots of other jokes, then they are likely the same user using a VPN. Ban them from life. 5/ If a user thinks his account has been copied, make it simple for legit users to report it. A simple profile comparison will show which is the original account. Then block that user (IP and MAC address) for life. 6/ Add a button “heard it before” to credit old jokes and stop people trying to get credit for them. If say 3 different users click it then it’s likely an old joke. 7/ This site could almost be the best joke website on the net, if the administrator wasn’t the biggest joke on the net.

What does a bloke with a 12" cock have fior breakfast This morning I had eggs and bacon yesterday I had cornflakes

Poor Rangers

A guy and his wife are about to have sex when a bee flies into the room. Just as she opens her legs, the bee flies into her pussy and gets stuck. So her husband drives her to the hospital. The doctor says to the guy, "I have a plan but I'll only do it if you agree to it." The guy says "OK, as long as she is safe." So the doctor puts some honey on his dick and sticks it into her pussy. The guy asks "why are you doing that?" The doctor replies "the bee will come to my dick and when it lands, I will pull it out slowly." "It's not coming. I better go deeper!" The doctor went deeper and deeper. He began shafting the woman hard and seemed to be enjoying himself. The woman began to cry loudly, "AHH OHH AHH OHH MOTHER FUCKER! THANK YOU!" The doctor started fucking her like crazy. "WHY THE HELL ARE YOU DOING THAT!?" roared the husband. The doctor replied, "Changed my mind. I'm gonna drown the bastard!!!"

The lady who was interviewing me for a job said, "I've got two openings." The reply “ theirs 3 if your brave enough “ wasn’t was she was expecting

I think I might have a shower Just checked, yes I do, it's upstairs.

I just heard a woodpecker call me a paranoid twat in morse code.

The rats couldn't even win the mickey mouse cup ??