Sickipedia

When James Bond is abroad he is known as +44 07. Not a lot of people know that.

My missus has just come down the stairs in her Star Wars bikini to celebrate May 4th. Still prefer the film version of Jabba The Hutt.

I was trying to explain Tiswas to my young son. "Google 'Sally James creampied'," I told him. "....on second thoughts, don't."

Right wing pundits: 'The new Snow White is woke!' I should think so too. Wouldn't have been much of an ending if she wasn't.

My missus was applying some Anusol to my bottom when she stopped to watch Coronation Street, "Come on love, " I said, "just finish what you were doing, you know I don't watch soaps. " "Fucking idiot, " she replied, "if you'd've watched the soap in prison I wouldn't have to do this. "

Ex Dr Who assistant Noel Clarke has been arrested. He was caught trying to break into the Tardis to go back in time to prevent himself suing the Guardian.

Chris Martin's had a busy year, falling through trapdoors, exposing millionaires' affairs. It's like watching Scooby Doo.

Delighted to have contributed to the ratings of The Gavin and Stacey Christmas special. By refusing to watch it.

British Government confirms new immigration policy was conceived after they watched A Clockwork Orange. A bit of the old in-out, in-out.

Australia has a population density of 3.6-4 people per square kilometre. How the fuck are there any neighbours ?