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stemeister1149

9 months ago-Wordplay-Wordplay-Post Rating : 6

I've just seen 3 armed police by my house. I wonder where they get their jumpers from.

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Freshly Dug from the Graveyard

My friend was going on a date and asked me for recommendations for places to eat out. I said well your choices are either the vagina or the asshole, I'd go for whichever smells better once you get down there.

90pcrecycledmaterial

28 min ago

A jewish man enters a synagogue and starts praying, "God please help me, I'm in terrible debt, please let me win the lottery, so I can clear everything and stop worrying." Saturday comes and nothing. The following week he returns and prays, "God, my troubles are getting worse, my creditors are chasing me and I am so worried, please let me win the lottery this weekend." Again Saturday comes and nothing. The next week he's back again, "God, I'm desparate now, they're threatening my family, if I don't win the lottery this weekend, I fear one of them will die." A booming voice then comes down from above, "Solly, I'm trying to help, but could you at least meet me half way and BUY A FUCKING TICKET." (Credit- The late great Bernard Manning)

mp47

2 hours ago

Black Friday: 50% off all slaves

gwtp123

4 hours ago

Greta Thunberg says birds are flying out of the country in huge numbers because of air pollution from cars. One flew over the cuckoo's nest.

innit

9 hours ago

Before we split up, my ex asked: For one last time, will you indulge my leather fetishism?. I said No!. I can't be suede.

jackmeough

10 hours ago

Fresh Hell's Feedback (Comments)

scorpiox666 @innit, please for the love of god, please try posting something funny & or edgy you misery spreading loser.

20 min ago - View Post

scorpiox666 Great idea @pattate ……strap a bomb to yasel & pull the cord you miserable unfunny cunt.

23 min ago - View Post

scorpiox666 That shit was barely amusing 50yrs ago when Bernard Manning wrote it ya fuckin’ sad loser. Try coming up with something a lil more original & or funny ya habitual boring cunt.

25 min ago - View Post

scorpiox666 Try coming up with something a lil more original you fuckin’ perennial mind numbingly boring wanker.

28 min ago - View Post

scorpiox666 Face it mate, ya just an unfunny tosser.

31 min ago - View Post

scorpiox666 ….jeez, that meme is older than the internet you unfunny cunt.

32 min ago - View Post

Comedy Kill Count (Leaderboard)

dogsbody14

Rank : 1 | Score : 482.70

jackbuntis

Rank : 2 | Score : 381.70

risco

Rank : 3 | Score : 171.90

jimmysammy

Rank : 4 | Score : 169.30

lennyscrevasse

Rank : 5 | Score : 134.70

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