Sickipedia

I was shopping in Asda this afternoon when I nearly hit an elderly couple with my trolley. They had stopped abruptly right in front of me, the bloke was just about to go up the crisps aisle when his wife grabbed his arm and shouted at him "Arthur! Arthur! Why are you going up that aisle! That's the crisps aisle!" Poor Arthur answered "I quite like the odd packet of salt and vinegar". She came back at him with "I never eat crisps! You shouldn't either! They are so unhealthy!" She glared at him with a look of utter disgust, I reckon she wouldn't have looked more disgusted if poor Arthur had dropped his kecks and shat all over the supermarket floor. Anyway I managed to sneak a multi-pack of salt and vinegar McCoy's into their trolley, I hid it under their jumbo sized multi-pack of quilted toilet paper. I'm starting to feel a bit guilty about it now because she'll never fully trust poor Arthur again. I have visions of poor Arthur locking himself in his potting shed at the end of their garden trying to knock out a crafty one to a badly stained 1984 edition of Razzle magazine whilst she hammers hell out of the door shouting "Arthur! Arthur! I hope you're not eating crisps in there!" Mind you I suppose it's his own fault, I mean who in their right mind would marry someone who doesn't like crisps?