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I’ve just rekindled my relationship with a hot librarian.
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Katie Price is planning a reunion party with all of her sexual partners after the Covid crisis. The event will be held at the O2 arena. Spaces are still available for third night.
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Walkers Crisps have announced that, after 73 years of production, they are just about to finish their first sack of potatoes.
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BBC News. Apple products valued at 5m stolen in uk. Police are confident that both IPhones will be recovered soon.
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Daily Mail: Princess Diana has been voted as the most beautiful Royal of all time, beating Megan Markle into second place. Diana would have scored even higher if they’d used her pre-crash images.
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BBC News. Man dies from eating more than a bag of liquorice a day. I guess it takes all sorts.
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Several Paralympic athletes receive head injuries in the wheelchair hurdles final
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Prince Harry and Megan sign £100 million deal with Netflix. He really is the ginger bread man.
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I just had a really vivid mental image of my wife’s disfigured body, soaked in blood, smelling and decomposing, as I started to backfill the soil into her shallow grave. “John....John....are you even listening to me?” she said.....
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My grandad kept going on about how he was saved by his left wing views during the war. Definitely wasn’t his right wing. That one was shot off.
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