Sickipedia

"Nobody warned me the No 10 parties were against the rules" - John Christie, 1953

"Irishman faces 20 years in jail for mooning on New York flight" Bare your arse on a plane and spend the next 20 years baring your arse? Poetic justice? And no fairytale in New York.

I found it ironic that Johnson brought up Jimmy Saville. It took years for the country to realise that the blonde-haired monster had fucked everyone.

I found it really ironic that Johnson brought up Saville. It took years for the country to realise that the blonde-haired monster had fucked everyone.

My wife hates golden showers. She'll have to get used to them now that the gas price is shooting up.

Terminally ill? Recently bereaved? Can no longer afford cremation due to rocketing gas prices? Let the Soylent Corporation provide a green, economical, dignified disposal of your loved one's remains. Special Offer: free catering for the wake* *No vegetarian or vegan options

Former health secretary Sajid Javid is growing a beard. Will he be buying a backpack next?

Cost of living crisis, what cost of living crisis? I'm looking forward to having fresh-frozen pensioner for Christmas.

BREAKING NEWS: Boris Johnson to pay a surprise visit to the UK later today....

Sunday Times: "Drinking recycled sewage 'is the future'" Now the government want us to take the piss.