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sosij

Member since 7 years ago

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There's only one thing worse than having expired condoms. It's having a whole unopened box of expired condoms.

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OceanGate have confirmed that their new sub will have an engine that's powered by the sound of human screaming.

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2 years ago-Transvestite

Titan

Titan

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2 years ago-Sex and Shit-Wife

My Ex says the main thing that used to pee her off was that I'm always getting ahead of myself. Well ... actually she's not my Ex yet.

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I hear Amazon are moving into Healthcare, starting with an Ambulance Service. So if you have a Heart Attack and phone their emergency number, you can expect an Ambulance in a few days, or if you've got Prime sometime before 10pm tomorrow.

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2 years ago-Sex and Shit-Gay

Homosexuality was classified as an illness in Sweden up until 1979. So presumably you could call in sick on a Monday, saying you felt gay.

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2 years ago-Sex and Shit-Date

Online dating. Where the odds are good. But the goods are odd.

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They say that the vehicle you drive says a lot about your sexual preferences. Which is why I'm buying an Ice Cream van.

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How do you make a dog go 'Meow'? Freeze it solid and put it through a Band Saw. Meeeeeeeoooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.

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3 years ago-Sex and Shit-Wife

My wife left me for my best friend. Well ... actually he was a complete stranger at the time. But he's my best friend now.

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