Sickipedia

T***p is like the Hangover franchise. When you've seen the film they show you snapshots of how bad it was in the titles. People who worked on Hangover, please do not be offended!

Rudy Giuliani's press conference at Four Seasons Total Landscaping, between a dildo store and a crematorium, was somewhat ominous because now Rudy is somewhere between fucked and dead.

So I got temporarily suspended on Twitter, and if I had to guess a reason I would say it might have been this tweet @realamberheard, you can shit in my bed anytime you want....

So at a Zoom Meeting, my boss asked me why I had a bandage on my hand. Perhaps I gave him the worst reply ever. "When I was coming home from the pub last night, some cunt trod on my fingers."

Last month I bought a book called "How to avoid internet scams" on eBay. The bastard still hasn't arrived ...

So I want to buy a Zombie Queen Elizabeth costume for Halloween. Too soon?

Hey Elon Musk, I would love to pay $8 a month for free speech.

So in the lead-up to the football tonight, I've been investigating how the USA managed to get a draw in their England match. I've watched US Soccer Moms 1-5 and I still haven't seen them do anything football related. Go figure ...

So I was down the pub and this bonny lass sat next to me at the bar. After exchanging pleasantries about the weather etc I asked her name. She said - "the first thing you should know about me is that my pronouns are they/them". "Good for you", I said.

Does it make you gay if you put Last Christmas on the jukebox in January? Asking for a friend.