Sickipedia

So IRA man turned peacemaker Martin McGuiness has died of a heart condition. If he'd turned into a pacemaker he might still be alive.

All parents share their DNA with their children. So how come I got 10 years for it?

Buckingham Palace has announced that the Queen will attend Martin McGuiness's funeral on Thursday. In her dancing shoes.

The Government is to build two new prisons, in South Wales and Yorkshire. As if forcing crims to live in South Wales or Yorkshire wasn't punishment enough.

I was looking something up in the dictionary today and I came across Rolfing, which is defined as "a therapeutic technique for correcting postural faults and improving physical wellbeing through manipulation of the muscles and connective tissue." So that's what he was doing.

Just read that Bristol has it's own Grammar Vigilante who go's round late at night correcting shop front's where apostrophe's are in the wrong place's. Im sure I speak for all Sickipedia poster's when I say your a hero, mate

How can Muslims be so thick as to believe in the Koran, a book which wasn't even written until after Mohammed's death? Thank heavens I'm a Christian.

I always wondered what DFS stood for until I went there and heard what all the husbands were saying to their wives. Don't fucking start.

I swallowed a Welshman's sperm yesterday. That's the last time I'm having lamb for dinner.

Whenever I see a police dog patrol, I think it's disgusting that poor dumb animals are used in this way. Those dogs should be ashamed of themselves.