Sickipedia

I'm not sure why all the fuss about Jay Slater.. Every girl whose ever been to Tenerife knows it's the place to go at 19 years old to be arse-fucked, left naked in a drunken pool of spunk in an alleyway & never spoken to again.

Sad news about pornstar Sophie Anderson passing away.. . Not the first time I've needed a big box of tissues with her.

Studying Islam I'm really starting to appreciate it's vibrant, nuanced traditions and subtle meanings bonding communities across the globe. I learnt today, for example, the colloquial exclamation of "Allah Akbar" can be transcribed into over 100 languages and even with all those language differentials it still universally translates as: "FUCK, that smelly, flip-flop-wearing inbred Paki cunt's got a bomb, run, get the fuck out the fire exit now, RUNNN !"

I think Diane Abbott really gets a raw deal from that time she wore odd, mismatched shoes on Election Day. I genuinely don't think she should be blamed or laughed at for this... Everyone knows these blacks steal all their right shoes at Footlocker, it's in their DNA.

Addressing the attempted assassination of Donald Trump, Joe Biden stated in a press conference today, "There's no place in America for this". Obviously the senile old goat hasn't been around any American classrooms in a long time.

That video of that Paki getting kicked in the head at Manchester Airports' Terminal 2 brought back so many traumatic memories of how unfair life is .............. Reminded me of when I got back from Ibiza, rang an Uber driven by one of these inbred, foul-smelling paedo bastards who tried charging £40 for a £30 fare.

Following video released showing an armed officer seemingly kicking and stamping on an Asian suspect, Chief Constable Stephen Watson responded this evening explaining his decision to suspend the officer pending an IOPC enquiry: " When I sign off on one my officers carrying a firearm, I damn well expect them to use it on these inbred, flipflop-wearing cousin-marriers when they get the chance, not fuck around with little fairy kicks, for fucks sake!"

George Galloway always looks like he's playing dress-up as an Orthodox Jew which is even more bizarre given how balls deep he's into the Rochdale Paki community. He couldn't look any more out of place if he dressed as a deodorant or a bar of soap.

Top tip for Huw Edwards & future nonces in the festering BBC maggotpile: watch & download whatever perverted content you want. Just tell the cops you accidentally picked up my laptop off the IT guys. I always write my name underneath it in black marker. Louis Walsh is borrowing it next week apparently... Sincerely, Jimmy S.

Stephen Lawrence's body is being returned to the UK from Jamaica apparently ..... Infortunately not the first time UK customs has had to deal with an unwanted, funky-smelling package that the blacks just refuse to grow out of...