Sickipedia

For your GF

Just heard that the longest river in french has dried up significantly. So now all the froggies should fill some buckets of water up from their taps and go fill the river back up. With clever thinking like that, they can all beat this dry spell.

What breaks when you give it to a toddler? Their hips.

There's an advert on the TV for Vanish that says the worst time to find a stain on your clothes is when you're doing the ironing. Surely, the worst time to find a stain on your clothes is when you've been taken to the criminal forensic lab.

BREAKING: World's biggest clown purchases world's largest circus.

girlswithdickman

Mummy takes little Johnny to the zoo. As they pass the elephant cage, the elephant has an erection. "What's that, Mummy?" asks the child. "Nothing, Johnny, nothing," says the embarrassed mother, swiftly leading him on. A week later Johnny's dad takes him and the same happens. "What's that, Daddy?" "That, son, is the elephant's penis." "Mummy said it was nothing." "Your mother's spoilt, Son!"

Fashion Models now a days

An Essex girl and John are playing a game of hide and seek. John counts to ten while the Essex girl hides. After about thirty seconds, John gets a text from the Essex girl saying: “If you find me, you can lick my pussy and fuck me up the arse. If you can’t, I’m in the shed.”

What's the difference between diarrhoea and a turd? You can't gargle with a turd.