Sickipedia

Who the fuck wants to see an advert for vaginal dryness when your halfway through eating your tea?

I see that Ed Sheeran gives himself a daily allowance of £47,000. How the fuck is he supposed to manage on that?

If you're wondering where Quintin Crisp has got to it's because he was raped and indecently assaulted by a gang of at least 10 black guys. He's currently out there searching for them so that they can have another go.

Things are really getting bad during this lock down. I've been watching episodes of Father Brown on the BBC. Anyone else on the verge of a breakdown it's on Monday to Friday at 2.15 pm.

I see Prince Andrew went back to work for the first time yesterday since the Epstein scandal. Can someone please tell me what work is involved in a regatta?

Janet Street Porter said she used to do a morning radio show and people hated her voice. Let me tell you something Janet. Your voice is still shit on the TV, and I hate your face as well. You're one ugly motherfucker. Your face looks like something the devil shit and forgot to lick.

Is it right for a guy to watch girls walking to school in sexy black tights? Asking for a friend.

Last minute transfer news: Manchester United player Fred had been swapped with a player from the Great Britain Paralympic football team.

I think everyone reached for the sick bucket last night after Tyrone said he was going for a bath and did Alina want to use his water after him? FFS, after he's pissed and farted in it. No chance.

Gillian Anderson says she's never going to wear a bra again. Away to go Gillian. You've got my full support. (Nod to Darker)