Sickipedia

In an attempt to end the "war" in Ukraine, Australian Prime Minister, Scott Morrison has banned Vladimir Putin from coming to Australia. Nice one ScoMo, that should fuck him. In other news, Ukraine banned Putin's troops from entering Ukraine.

Lance Armstrong and Ben Johnson are said to be considering putting in appeals to the Australian sports dope testing department for their bans for being full of untested shit. "If Novak is banned, surely we're clean"?

Government Advice Be sure to get jabbed so that your friend who has been jabbed won't catch the virus they were jabbed to be protected from.

Matt Hancock didn't do it all wrong. Apparently her feet were 1.5 metres apart.

I hear a black garbage bag full of hot air has been punctured. Well, black lives matter eh?

I saw a job advertised last week and applied for it. Today I got a letter telling me the firm had closed down as all the staff were sick. Apparently it something to do with me sending them my CV.

On a serious note. I am on day 3 of quarantine and was wondering if anyone had any porn sites they'd like to recommend other than: Xvideos PornHub Xtube Ass parade Brazzers xHamster XNXX YouPorn YouJizz TastyBlacks HClips TnaFlix Tube8 Spankbang DrTuber Spankwire KeezMovies Nuvid SunPorno BravoTube PornHD Eporner SexVid XXXBunker TheNewPorn Mofosex... PornDreamer X18 Xbabe UpdateTube BeFuck Hdmovz PornRox PornMaki Pornid Inxporn TopFreePornVideos Slutload ProPorn FakePorn Pornhost HandjobHub Vpornvideos MyXVids Pornicom DansMovies Wetplace AdultFreex Wankflix 88fuck Fapdu Rude FreudBox AdultInc PornHeed HdPorn Orgasm PornRabbit MadThumbs Fux Eroxia DeviantClip Xxvids H2porn ApeTube MetaPorn YourLustMovies ElephantTube Long PornerBros Tubegalore 3movs Ass-Time HQButt BangBus BangBros Ghetto tube RedTube BrickHouseButts GhettoGaggers GloryHole Xvideos PornHub Xtube Ass parade Brazzers xHamster XNXX Nuvid SunPorno BravoTube PornHD Eporner SexVid BrickHouseButts (Obviously loads more but the 1200 character limit.....thanks to Nigel, via WhatsApp) These have gotten boring.

I can remember the days when we used to smoke in pubs, now we can't even drink in them.

Mr Ching Chong Kwong of Wuhan, China is responsible for the release of the virus. If only he'd turned off the TV and got on with tidying the garage, cutting the grass and putting his clean clothes away (and various other small odd jobs) his Mrs, Professor Ming Chong Kwong wouldn't have got so pissed off at the lab that she went for the 2 weeks trapped indoors with no sport option.

Are there any car mechanics out there who can advise me please? The engine warning light has just come on in our Mitsubishi which was serviced last week. Could it be the car owner virus?