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Gay men are just fucking arseholes.
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Here we are getting all this snow and there's Max Clifford going somewhere nice and hot.
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Stuart Hall, Rolf Harris and Max Clifford walk into a bar. Barman says not Yew Tree again
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Today I saw an advert for the suicide helpline on the back of a bus. I couldn't help but think, surely it would work much better on the front.
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My brother just updated his status to "I love my girlfriend <3". I always knew he liked them young, but that is fucking ridiculous
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North Korea have said they now have an intercontinental ballistic nuclear missile capable of reaching the USA. All they need now is someone to drive the truck.
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I'm taking up scuba diving - I’m using a Walkers crisp bag ironically which has enough air in it to last for three hours.
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My friend Muhammed just turned 40 and has just joined a terrorist group.... I said fucking hell you`re having a midlife ISIS.
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My therapist told me that a great way to let go of your anger is to write letters to people you hate and then burn them... I did that and I feel much better but I'm wondering...do I keep the letters?
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I just had a sneak peek at one of my Christmas presents today. A bag of fucking rice?. Thanks Uncle Ben.
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