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div599

Member since one year ago

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div599

26 days ago-Wordplay-Wordplay-Post Rating : -1

Just found out that cows produce more milk if the farmer talks to them. It's a case of in one ear and out the udder.

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div599

one month ago-Wordplay-Wordplay-Post Rating : 16

The wife said she got an ever ready chicken for tea.. I said "don't you mean oven ready" She said" no, it's a battery hen.

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div599

2 months ago-Wordplay-Wordplay-Post Rating : 10

I spotted a little cake stall with an honesty box outside. So I stopped and ate 4. I left a note saying, 'slightly dry, use more fruit next time"

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div599

2 months ago-Wordplay-Wordplay-Post Rating : 12

I think I managed to fix my friends broken microphone.. Just waiting for some feedback.

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div599

2 months ago-Wordplay-Wordplay-Post Rating : 24

Not a lot of people know this. But the singer Bill Withers had a brother called Bear, who wrote telephone hold music.

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div599

2 months ago-Wordplay-Wordplay-Post Rating : 2

Before we get to Movember if anyone wants To sponsor me to eat triangular Swiss chocolate Next month I'm doing Octoblerone.

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div599

2 months ago-Wordplay-Wordplay-Post Rating : 11

Just read a book called "how to clear leaves from your driveway." By Ray King.

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div599

2 months ago-Wordplay-Wordplay-Post Rating : 2

My mate said he used to be in a band called the Fortunes. I asked him if they called it that because they thought they'd make lots of money? He said no, we only knew four tunes.

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div599

2 months ago-Wordplay-Wordplay-Post Rating : 13

I got shown round an empty perfume factory yesterday. It made no scents whatsoever...

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div599

3 months ago-Wordplay-Wordplay-Post Rating : 6

Fun fact. Did you know that chesney hawkes in Spanish is Juan Anonli.

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