Sickipedia

You can tell that Doctor Who is science fiction. If he turned up in the UK, in these times. He would be imprisoned as an illegal immigrant.

Tonight is the BBC Children in Need Appeal. Where the BBC raises money for numerous children's charities, through a night of entertainment. Except this year, it's going to be BBC in Need. Where they try to raise $1 billion to pay Trump.

The I in Donald Trump stands for Intelligence.

I think it's going to take some balls to win tonight's £15m Lotto jackpot.

Someone at work asked me if I wanted milk in my coffee. I said, "No. I like my coffee, how I like my women!". They replied, "Black?" "No, without another mans dick in it."

Did everything Scottish person start off as a Scotch Egg?

Pop up ads are just the Jehovah Witnesses of the Internet.

When I asked for a Pb&J sandwich, I didn't expect to find lead in it.

i was asked once what my favourite joke was. i said "i can't tell it". they replied "is it that rude!?!" i replied "no. my pronunciation is that bad, i can't tell it!"

you have heard it has been said that "9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape" and that how "8 out of 10 people only enjoy gang rape. as her father is having second thoughts" but i tell you now, that it is "10 out of 10 people. as the person died of corona virus and was a necrophiliac"