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cloudcuckoo

5 years ago-Crime-Theft-Post Rating : 22

Recently someone nearly got away with stealing several paintings from the Louvre. However, after planning the crime, breaking in, evading security, getting out, and escaping with the goods, he was captured only 5 miles away when his van ran out of petrol. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such a foolish error running out of fuel, he replied, "I had no Monet to buy Degas to make the Van Gogh."

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Freshly Dug from the Graveyard

An Essex girl and John are playing a game of hide and seek. John counts to ten while the Essex girl hides. After about thirty seconds, John gets a text from the Essex girl saying: “If you find me, you can lick my pussy and fuck me up the arse. If you can’t, I’m in the shed.”

johnnysins

2 hours ago

Paddy & Mick walking down the road, and Paddy's got a bag of doughnuts in his hand. Paddy says to Mick "If you can guess how many doughnuts are in my bag, You can have them both"

redneon

4 hours ago

My girlfriend left me because she said I was sex mad. Sex mad with her sister who had nicer bigger tits.

creepycripple

10 hours ago

Celebrities wearing badges to award ceremonies that say “ICE out” I hope the waiters spit in their drinks instead

whoisj95

18 hours ago

Grok comes under fire as it's publicly acknowledged that people can use it to generate images of people nude without their consent. No-one put an image of Wasp's wife naked on here!

hadoken

22 hours ago

Fresh Hell's Feedback (Comments)

nausicaa Image upload size is limited.

15 hours ago - View Post

dogglebe Did she put on those those eyebrows with a paint roller?

17 hours ago - View Post

dogsbody14 Probably the funniest thing post on here for fucking years!!

18 hours ago - View Post

mandylost took advice from her wife to put it in drive which is how come she got blown away

yesterday - View Post

secretsiteagent More like the tread from their tyres

yesterday - View Post

beanflicker Fkn class 👏

yesterday - View Post

Comedy Kill Count (Leaderboard)

sphinctered

Rank : 1 | Score : 52.20

ponga

Rank : 2 | Score : 32.34

rory

Rank : 3 | Score : 25.90

redneon

Rank : 4 | Score : 19.50

hadoken

Rank : 5 | Score : 16.40

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