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Alone at Christmas? Simulate the sensation of licking out your imaginary girlfriend using the following steps: 1. With bare arms, bend your elbow about ninety degrees 2. Repeatedly rub your tongue up and down the crease 3. Slowly add drops of olive oil so you can pretend you have an effective technique Remember to ask 'have you cum yet' every thirty seconds. Pro tip 1: piss on your arm first for the natural aroma Pro tip 2: add some out of date salmon paste for the authentic taste Pro tip 3: smear the whole area in garlic cottage cheese and crushed paracetamol to pretend you’re with a diseased gypsy whore Source: a foul-mouthed spotty kid in class in 1982. Damn, he was funny.

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Fresh Hell's Feedback (Comments)

nausicaa just being friends with a queer is enough to send you to hell?

5 hours ago - View Post

nausicaa Can Jimmysammy still post a Trump Pic/Joke every 5 minutes?

7 hours ago - View Post

nausicaa It’s a dangerous game. Risky business, but worth it. Love lighting farts.

9 hours ago - View Post

nausicaa I'm finding it hard to beat or take in hand?

11 hours ago - View Post

nausicaa A pair of bollocks, then?

11 hours ago - View Post

nausicaa 💯 👍🏻👍🏻 …quite agree, this once black & grey site full of edgy material now resembles something like a poofters colourful paradise presenting Basil Brush content. Mods can’t even whore themselves out properly…. Making an arse of themselves with gems & with a pathetic attempt at monetisation… fkn tossers.

21 hours ago - View Post

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