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An old fella moves into a well-provisioned retirement village. On the first morning he visits the naturalist area of the large grounds - and comes across a well-endowed woman enjoying the outdoors without clothes. When he could not suppress a significant erection, she asks "Is that an invitation?". She explained to him that in this village an erection is regarded as a unspoken invitation to 'capitalise on the opportunity'. As he did not want to break with any of their traditions - he agreed, and carried out the task enthusiastically. At midday he was enjoying a pre-lunch drink at the retirement village bar - when he inadvertently passed wind. "Is that an invitation?" asked a fellow nearby, who explained that it was recognised in the village as an invitation for anal sex. Unwilling to contravene an accepted local practice - he reluctantly agreed. That afternoon he hurried into the manager's office. "I'm afraid I just don't fit in here," he said. "I have no option but to pack up my belongings and leave. I have an erection only once every few months - but I fart about 30 times a day!"
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