Sickipedia

Every night I pray that Russia invades Britain. Putin would have this Brexit shit sorted by tomorrow morning.

Only three more Christmases til Brexit.

Sacked twice for lying, incompetent as foreign Secretary, looks and sounds like the mumbling fuck child of Winston Churchill and the Honeymonster. But I'm sure Alexander Boris De Pfeffel Johnson is a real man of the people, what could possibly go wrong?

To keep both Leavers and Remainers happy , why don't we go for the only thing that will keep us IN and OUT of the EU. Schrodinger's Brexit.

"Just sign here to prorogue Parliament Ma'am , and we won't extradite Andrew over to New York."

I've told my missus not to eat the chocolate coins on the Christmas tree this year because after March they will be worth a sight more than real fucking money.

Fuck, that Jean Claude Van Damme is a jack of all trades. Martial artist, movie star and President of the EU commission.

Europe: Were sorry you're leaving, but you will need to settle your bill before you go. " "Theresa May: "It's ok, we'll send your exports back, please be expecting five million immigrants in the next few months, "

My parents asked me what I wanted most of all for Christmas and they said whatever I wanted, they'd make sure I got it. So I asked for a bike. For 2 years now, I've been waiting. They both kept reassuring me that I'm going to get one but they can't decide what kind of bike. I've heard mum say it's too dangerous and I should only have one with stabilisers, my dad says that's rubbish and she's mollycoddling me. They are up all night arguing about it. When I complain, they say that I had no idea what I was asking for when I asked for a bike, nor how extremely difficult it is to get a bike. They now say that it might not be possible but they are thinking about giving me a second chance to choose my present. I fucking hate having politicians for parents.

'...Coincidentally with Brexit, the clocks go back on October 31st. Let's hope they go back 50-years BEFORE Britain had even HEARD of the European Union.'