Sickipedia

I couldn't give a fuck what vegans have to say. I don't talk to prey.

I knocked a proud to be vegan cyclist off his bike today after he went through a red light. I've had to bill him for damage to my car, the police and ambulance services attended but I've been assured by the paramedic despite the cyclist having broken bones and may not ride a bike again I will eventually stop laughing.

The hardest part about being vegan is having to wake up at 5am to milk the almonds

I could never be vegan because I love pudding... and you can't have it if you don't eat your meat.

Crowdsurfing at vegan concerts. Best avoided.

I like the fact China has respect for dogs. They made sure they were quite clean when i had my dog kebab.

They say cows are bad for the Environment because all they do is eat plants and Fart. Kind of like Vegans.

I was walking down the street in my new jacket, when this teenager with blue hair and nose rings called me a 'murderer'. I stopped and said, 'You've got it wrong, son. This jacket is polyurethane. I have assurances that the dinosaurs it's made of were humanely killed by that meteor.'

My mouth waters when i smell steak.. I wonder if the same thing happens to vegans When they mow the grass.

A vegan influencer has died of starvation and exhaustion after trying to survive only eating fruit! Now that's what you call a bad influence