Sickipedia

Why do Hong Kong police like to show up to work early? To beat the crowd.

We shouldn't treat Jo Brand too harshly, she once suffered the trauma of an acid attack herself . Someone put far too much vinegar on her chips.

Bloke at work has got florets syndrome, after being the 20th person to tell me that fucking joke, I twatted the cunt and gave him a cauliflower ear .

Just been attacked by a ginger kid doing martial arts... turns out he was the Carroty Kid

2012 headlines: “End white supremacy: we need more black faces at Hollywood awards” 2022 headlines: “Black-on-black violence at Oscars caused by systemic racism” 2032 headlines: “Only 17 shot dead at ‘mostly peaceful’ Oscars”

Some MPs want to make online abuse a hate crime.... The mardy arsed limp dicked bunch of twatting spunk sucking mother fucking arse wiping cunt bubbles.

The man who stabbed 4 people in the back during the weekend is said to be 6 foot 3, slim build and white. April fools, of course, he’s black.

There's a sign in my local park that reads, 'Please do not cycle on the grass. You may injure a young child or elderly person.' I'm pissed about the cycling, but at least they've provided an alternative activity.

Someone keeps sending me flowers with the heads cut off. I think I'm being stalked.

That poor kid who got shot just seemed to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. Liverpool