Sickipedia

Million dollar idea: Maternity clothes, but for beer bellies.

Katie Price is like a Peperami Cheap, processed and artificial

My girlfriend likes roleplay in the bedroom; she's let me fuck her while dressed as Lara Croft, Faith Connors and Tifa Lockhart. But she looked very shocked when I suggested Bubbles from the Powerpuff Girls.

Miriam Margoyles has recently revealed that she too had nude photos of herself but chose to have them destroyed. So now we’ll just have to keep using our imagination...

I saw this young woman, at the bus stop, with her nose in her phone. I wanted to check her smartness, so I asked her if she could spell "me", without her phone. She glared at me and said "M-E". I said, you forgot the "D". She said "There's no D in ME". And now, I'm explaining this to the police ...

Imagine all the corpses

Every morning I wake up to her beautiful face beside me, with those long blonde locks draped across the pillow. I wish she'd trim those pubes.

So good, they named it twice

Gregg Wallace was asked what he thought about using dried up old prunes on bake off He replied " that Kirsty Wark can choke on my spotted dick"

When you meet a famous person, it's acceptable to say you had a crush on them when you were younger. I used to wank over you, can scare them. I've found.