Sickipedia

#MarkRees1981 was in hospital for a circumcision and I asked the doctor how long the gobshite would be in. “I don’t know “ replied the unlucky doctor who had to touch the ugly twat, “ there’s no end to this prick “.

"I'm not happy about this," I protested. "Nonetheless, your son's gender reassignment surgery starts tomorrow," replied the NHS consultant. "The entire medical board have all agreed with her that she is a female trapped in a male body." "Even if it all works, and he ends up looking like a girl," I said, "you can always tell by the deep voice...." "He has a naturally high-pitched voice, so that won't be an issue," said the doctor. "For fucksake," I yelled. "That'll break when he reaches puberty, he's only 11."

This transvestite activist group has been holding me captive so long now that it's become second nature for me to wear a dress. I've got Frockholm Syndrome.

Still can't believe the Canadian "non-binary" person who wants surgery to have a penis and a vagina. If I wanted to see a dick and a cunt in the same place I'd watch Saturday night takeaway.

I would like to formally announce that I now identify as a woman and henceforth wish to be addressed as Gladys. I don't think they're likely to re-introduce conscription, but better safe than sorry.

Report: Olympics wants to cancel "sexualisation" of attractive female athletes. I don't think they're going to achieve much, I've even had a couple of wanks that I'm quite unproud of to Laurel Hubbard.

“I caught my twelve-year-old son looking up women’s skirts today,” I told the barman after my second whiskey. “That’s pretty normal for a twelve-year-old, isn’t it?” he asked. “Not on eBay it isn’t!” I said.

Some dodgy tranny came in to my shop earlier, and paid for his shopping with a crisp £50 note. I inspected it and said "I'm sorry I don't accept counterfeits in my shop" He said "I can assure you that note is legal tender" I said "I was talking about your gender, now fuck off and don't come back"

A bit unfair that Lia Thomas American transgender swimmer won the women's freestyle 500m by a length.