Sickipedia

Men with neck tattoos used to make people nervous. Now they make them lattes.

If you’re a tattoo artist who gives free tattoos in exchange for being flashed at.... Are you a believer of tit for tat then?

I had Gucci tattooed on my ball sack. Just in case the missus starts mithering for a designer bag again.

Got the letter S tattooed on my left bum cheek and an X on the right bum cheek. No Admin are offended when I bend over.

Tattoos are like kids. You all act as if they’re permanent but they can easily be removed with lasers.

I went to the tattoo parlour and asked if they could tattoo the word for octopus tentacle parts just above my eyebrows. "Well, we can," he said, "but it will cost you £345." "Ha!" I replied. "Do I look like I've got 'Sucker' written on my forehead?"

I got a tattoo that says "I'm an attention-seeking twat". Which is strange, given that it doesn't have any text on it.

My girlfriend got a new tattoo of Yogi's head on her arse without even telling me. She's got a bear-faced cheek.

I wound up having no objection to the tattoo that my fat daughter got on the back of her neck, and in fact I actually thought it rather suited her. It says, "Let go of my ears, I know what I'm doing !"

Now as the £150 council tax rebate has hit their bank accounts, all the fat slags will be able to afford to tattoo the names of their kids latest 'uncles' names on the back of their necks. Probably quite cheap though because most previous names will be Billy and Tommy....