Sickipedia

Stevie Wonder -7 kids David Blunkett - 5 kids Ray Charles - 12 kids I think it's safe to say it's not wanking that makes you blind.

It's a little known fact, that in the 1980s statistically girls called Eileen spent more on dry cleaning than girls with any other name.

I couldn’t believe it when my glasses fell off while watching some fat old slag playing with herself. Honestly, I never saw it coming.

When my Kids refuse to eat something. My wife will hide it in their food so they don’t know it’s there. And this perfectly acceptable in her eyes Yet when I wank into her food because she refuses to swallow my load. This isn’t acceptable in her eyes and I’m a cunt apparently.

I have every right to call my dad a wanker. I’m a test tube baby from 1981.

A teenage boy from Bristol is believed to be the first person in the UK to go blind due to a poor, junk food diet. That's what he told his mum, anyway.

I just couldn't resist having a wank into a wok full of stir-fried noodles. Does this make me pansexual?

I got caught having a cheeky wank in a massive supermarket. They said that behaviour is unacceptable, especially when you're working on the till.

'Virgin needs money' Usually something I see in the back pages of Razzle.

If I had parkinson’s disease, I’d glue my hand to my cock