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Posted yesterday; 'Famed paedophile and shithouse publicist of reality TV stars Max Clifford has been found dead in jail. Chris Rea, whose Christmas song has been playing in every fucking bastard shop I go into has been rushed to hospital with a suspected heart attack. This begs the question... What the fuck am I going to use my last wish on?' Today, Keith Chegwin dies age 60. Merry Christmas, everyone.
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