Sickipedia

I went to visit my parents in Scotland last weekend. Mother well? No, Dundee

I went to Northern France last weekend to watch a live gig which was headlined by a famous american female solo singer. Brittany? No, Beyonce

I went to Belgium for the weekend. Went to a restaurant which did a full english Sunday roast dinner. Chicken, stuffing, Yorkshires, roast potatoes and lots of green veg. Brussels? No, I went for the broccoli

My police detective brother in law has been been transferred to West Yorkshire constabulary to head up the search for a murder suspect. Leeds? No, he said the investigation has hit a brick wall

I often get the ferry to northern France to buy off cuts of chicken at this fantastic butchers shop. Brest? No, I prefer the thighs and drumsticks.

Got chatting to this bloke in the pub and he told me he flies to France every weekend to sit on a park bench and take photos of the young girls and boys playing. Nantes? Yes, it would seem so.

I'm not sure if car insurance prices vary depending on where you live but I think I've got a cracking deal. I live in Sussex. Hastings? No, Direct Line

I am fed up with the punters continually telling me what to do in my job as a croupier in a casino in Kent. Deal? Don't you fucking start.

"A very famous former British prime minister used to insure the country against going to war." "Churchill?" "No, Sunlife."

"I was in a red light district in Poland at the weekend. I went to a peep show and watched this naked 18-year-old girl using sex toys on herself." "Krakov?" "God yeah, all over the glass screen."