Sickipedia

It was my birthday so before our obligatory fuck, my wife dressed up in a "sexy maid's uniform" with a pinny. I was able to orgasm into the fat walrus-looking bitch thinking, "This rather does suit a Pinniped."

My large wife claimed she was sick at a hot-air-balloon event, and wouldn't go in the dirigible she paid an expensive ticket for. "This blimp won't go up," I sighed.

Some little kid behind my wife in the queue asked her, "Are you The Hulk ?" I said, "You're on point about her size, but it's probably just chlorosis from vitamin-deficiency that's made her skin turn green."

There was some stupid thing in "Diversity Training" last week where it was said that the song "R-E-S-P-E-C-T" by Arethra Franklin was somehow "the greatest thing ever to happen in black culture." "Of course," I laughed, "It proved that black people finally know how to spell."

We were in New York and got stopped by the lady from "Extra Medium Stuff" doing Street Trivia. She asked, "for $ 500, what does the 19th Amendment to the US Constitution do ?" I quickly replied, "It grants women suffrage," and then she was none too pleased when I ripped the money out of her hand and laughed, "And we've been suffering ever since."

My wife's thinking of giving up being an Adele impersonator, because she's now too fat to tour. "Shoud I give up, or should I just keep cracking pavements ?"