Sickipedia

Mmmm, I'm so vexed. I've just been woken by screeching kitty cats in my alley. Mind you Ducky, i don't mind being disturbed up my back passage.

I was sat on the sofa with one of my bumchums Ducky Dennis and i said, "Fucking eck, I'm so bored Ducky dear, lets play hide and seek. I'll hide and you seek..If you find me i'll suck you off, but if you can't find me i'll be in the wardrobe".

I applied to for a job at the local garden centre and the dishy young hunk who interviewed me asked "What way are you qualified for employment at this nursery"? I replied "Now look Ducky dear..i'm very good with the Pansies".

I was mincing up the high street when this gorgeous young man with a clipboard stopped me. He said "I'm doing a survey, have you reduced the amount of plastic in your hosehold. I replied " Oh yes ducky dear, i always use cardboard straws now when i'm doing a spot of felching".

The Grand old Duke of York, He had ten thousand men. Ooooh, the lucky bastard.

Me and my bumchum Ducky Dennis can't wait for Santa to come down our chimney. We're going to help him empty his sack.

I ran in the police station screaming "Help me i've just been raped by a brute of a man". The hunky desk sergeant said "leave it to us, we'll find the bastard. So i said " When you do ducky, could you get me his phone number".

I was at a gay bukake party and one of the muscly stud muffins got me in the eye with his sticky white love mess. I said " Mmmm, i didn't see that cumming ducky".

I answered my door this morning to a hunky. postman and he said. "I've got a large package for you". I replied " I can see that ducky and i'm not talking about that big parcel you're hands".

As the butcher handed me my shopping he said " Here you go Sir...i think,2lbs of my finest beef sausages". I replied "Believe me ducky, this won't be the best meat i'll be having today".