Sickipedia

My dyslexic pal says he'll never get over the demise of Jean Charles de Menezes " I used to love popping in there for some fags or a tin of sweets before getting on the train ", he added (Nobody under 40 will get this)

Nonce to Nonce

Chuck Berry walked into a chemist and asked for some contraception. When asked what type he said, "Johnny'd be good"

Bob Vylan & Kneecap will be investigated by the police following their performances at Glastonbury I didn't think they were that bad

My daughter got married today despite getting mud all over the bottom of her dress on the way into the church. She told me she loved the poignant and emotional experience in spite of the black & irritating presence throughout I know exactly how she felt. Has anyone seen the movie "Ghost" ?

David Lammy is so thick, he stared at a bottle of orange juice for an hour because it said "concentrate" Nod to jackmeough

Picking a side in this Trump / Musk spat It's like choosing between having AIDS or going to a Lenny Henry stand-up gig

Homer Simpson gets home from the nuclear power plant one night and finds a massive skidmark laced around the bowl of the Evergreen Terrace shitter " For fuck's sake Marge ! " , he shouts , "Have you had a poo today ? " " Yes Homey " , she shouts back , " Up the arse by the Kiwk-e-Mart bins ! "

TOP TIP: Embittered former incel Sicki down-voters. Keep your identities a total fucking mystery by posting "jokes" and comments insulting everyone else

What's the difference between Katie Price & Manchester United's new stadium? You'll only be able to get 100,000 pricks in the stadium