Sickipedia

Guys it's been a fucking good ride ,We all know it is not as good as original ,but hey ho a good joke is a good joke To cut matters short after three years of fighting cancer .It has appeared in brain causing double vision and slowly losing vision so i am retiring hurt Weaverdog and many others keep up the good work feel free to rip the piss would not expect anything else

It was my wife's 50th today and she's been trying to convince everyone that age hasn't taken it's toll. "Look!" She gasped. "I can still touch my toes!" "That's great hun" I said. "Though I'm not so sure it counts if it's with your tits!"

So begins four weeks of Moaning, crying ,frustration. throwing things at the t.v .getting drunk ..the fucking mother in law is here for a month

During sex last night, my partner whispered in my ear, "Pretend you're my dad." I was furious. "You are one sick-minded girl, what a disgusting thing to ask me." I stormed out of the bedroom and slammed the door. I mean, you don't expect shit like that from your sister, do you?

My blonde girlfriend thought she might be pregnant so I bought her one of those home pregnancy tests. I took the stick out of the box, told her to go into the toilet and do her business on it. 5 minutes later I shouted "Has it turned blue yet?" She said, "No, it's still brown!"

I'm not saying people in my area have bad teeth, but one woman just smiled in Tesco and the barcode scanner picked it up as a set of saucepans. P.S That`s how you write a teeth joke Genghis

Three football fans were driving along when they spied a body in the undergrowth. Stopping their car, the three guys ran over to see what they could do. Unfortunately, they found the nude body of a deceased young woman. Being gentlemen, the first guy dropped his Spurs hat over one breast. The second guy, a Liverpool fan, placed his hat over the other breast. The Manchester United fan then placed his hat over the woman's private parts. Soon the police arrived. The copper started checking over the body. He picked up the Spurs hat and quickly placed it back. He then picked up the Liverpool hat and returned it. Then he picked up the Man United Fan hat, put it down, then picked it up again inspecting the hat more closely, and then put it down. Then he picked it up a third time. By this time, the Man United fan was a bit irritated and he asked, "Why do you keep picking up that hat? Are you some kind of pervert or something?" The copper responded with a wry smile, "Son, I can't figure this one out. Usually when I come across one of these Man United hats, there's an arsehole under it."

Next season Spurs will be sponsored by Viagra, because they can't get past a semi.

B.B.C News Technology : Headlines Facebook's Zuckerberg fires back at Apple's Tim Cook .. Jesus thats esculated ...Youtube yesterday now this..what next Twitter to do a drive by on Snapchat

B.B.C News : Melon kills 5 people in Austrailia As if they don`t have enough fucking wildlife to do that job already