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hadoken

Member since 5 years ago

3

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-3

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hadoken

2 days ago-Sex and Shit-Pervert-Post Rating : 2

I've been arrested for "outraging public decency". Note so self: don't masturbate while cleaning the windows of a nursery.

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hadoken

3 days ago-Other-Stupid-Post Rating : 2

The vet reported me to the police for animal cruelty, when the cat was finally out of the bag.

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hadoken

6 days ago-Sex and Shit-Wife-Post Rating : 2

As I woke up in the middle of the night, I screamed as I saw what I thought was a zombie approaching in the dark. Nope - it was just my wife returning from the toilet.

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hadoken

7 days ago-Racism-British-Post Rating : -8

Following this year's Budget, I am now officially leaving the country. Good luck, everyone. Yours, Sgt Pete Kerr, The Royal Yorkshire Regiment

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hadoken

8 days ago-Crime-Violence-Post Rating : -9

Little Elsie was a shy girl, but as she continued to practice she began to notice a newfound kind of magic in her dancing performed by but herself alone. Then a crazed black Welsh choirboy ran in with a machete...

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hadoken

13 days ago-Crime-Paedophilia-Post Rating : -7

I was fucking a 14-year-old schoolgirl and she screamed. For she had regained consciousness.

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hadoken

14 days ago-Jokes With No Home-Random-Post Rating : -11

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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hadoken

15 days ago-Crime-Violence-Post Rating : -5

I was leading a kids' dance class. Imagine the horror of all of us when a crazed black youth rushed in and started stabbing everyone. He was singing: "Holl amrantau'r sêr ddywedant Ar hyd y nos..."

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Pray for me. My drinking problem has become so bad I've had to let the wife drive.

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hadoken

22 days ago-In The News-Breaking News-Post Rating : 1

My wife has trust issues. She refuses to pay the licence fee any more.

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