Sickipedia

Saw this incredible girl at the pub last night. Looked at her and instantly she made me rock hard. Last fucking time I visit Medusa’s Bar.

Has anybody else tried watching the video by Pentatonix ," Can you feel the love", without staring at her tits for 4.32 minutes and 52 milliseconds

I was shagging this girl from Barnsley, weird thing was as l was pumping away she kept shouting out the name of some cartoon belgian detective . Tin Tin! ....Tin Tin!

What's the best line to pick up London girls? Coke.

I started chatting up a girl last night in the pub. Used the old, “Get your coat love, you’ve pulled.” And “Your place or mine?” lines. She said, “Listen creep, I wouldn’t sleep with you if you were the last man on Earth.” I said, “Listen love, if I was the last man on Earth, you’d have no say in the matter.” Think that told the feisty bitch ... probably a lesbo anyway. On a separate note, anyone know how to get red wine out of a white suit?

I met a girl in a club last night, after a few drinks she asked if I would like to go back to her place for sex, I didn't want to disappoint her, So I said "No".

Ladies, allow me to introduce myself. I'm the man of your dreams! If you eat a lot of cheese before bedtime.

I've always been unlucky in my love life so I ordered a book from Amazon called "How to Woo". The cunts sent me volume 2 of the Beijing telephone directory.

Jenny Éclair is a fraud, just seen her advertising Vagisil, she didn't have a problem last Friday night

There's a hot, new deaf chick at work. I reckon I'm in with a shout.