Sickipedia

Amber Heard has announced she's given birth to twins. 'It's been a nightmare dealing with all the screaming and picking up all of the shit', said one of the babies.

a place in the ground

Christmas shopping for my kids. I've bought them action figures from the latest superhero movie. I understand why Aquaman comes with a little plastic trident, but why does Mera come with a little brown curly cigar ?

Apparently Manchester United have tried to sign RussellBrand because he still scores more than Rashford....

If the new Johnny Depp and Amber Heard movie isnt called 'defication defamation' I think the producers shat the bed.

With her acting career in the toilet, Amber Heard has moved to France and bought herself a winery. Chateau Ve Debed

THOUGHT OF THE DAY Imagine lighting Jo Brand's farts

So Johnny Depp spent 50K in a Curry House. I think he might be planning an 'Armageddon Revenge shit'

Apparently Johnny Depp will now face the winner of......Colleen Rooney & Rebecca Vardy in next weeks final!

After the Depp verdict, Amber Heard isn't as unemployable as many people predicted. She's been offered a recording contract. Her first project is a duet with Jussie Smollet of the 1950s classic "How Could You Believe Me When I Said I Love You When You Know I've Been A Liar All My Life"