Sickipedia

Does anyone else think macrons wife looks like when ET dressed up as a woman ?

We were out driving and I pointed and said excitedly, "Look, that's LBC host James O'Brien !" "Never mind, that's just someone's Lawn Gnome"

I called up that Establishment tool James O'Brien over Brexit and the little Midget eventually said, "I'll explain it to you in a sports analogy...." "The only sports analogy you fucking understand is being in the showers with a tiny cock."

My fag son was complaining about how harmful it's going to be that RFK Jr wants to encourage Americans to drink raw milk. Coming from someone that always has a stomachfull of semen, it just rings a bit hollow.

Glad they cut the scene of Rees-Moggs enjoying the only Brexit benefit he ever identified (the extra-strong-sucking vacuum).

When Nigel Farage goes out to dinner, his biggest concern isn't whether or not the waiter has just spat in his food. It's whether or not the waiter has only spat in his food.

Keir Starmer is visiting Germany to renegotiate Brexit. I bet he's remembered to pack his white flag.

All the talk yesterday of "exit polls" confused me because I thought that was another name for the Brexit referendum.

A German walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender tells him : "20 euros!" The German is shocked - "20 euros? yesterday it was only 3 euros !" "Well, today it is 20 euros." \- "But why 20, damn it?" Bar tender : "I'll explain it, \-3 euros is beer,r> \-3 to help Ukraine, \-4 assistance to European countries who have imposed sanctions and are not members of the EU. \-4 euros in aid to the UK, for successful implementation of sanctions against Russia. \-Then 3 euros are sent to the Balkan countries as aid to buy furnace coal. \- and finally, 3 euros for a gas subsidy for the EU and fund to help maintain sanctions!" The German silently took out the money and gave the bartender 20 euros. The bartender took them, entered in the cash register and gave him 3 euros back. German in disbelief : "Wait, you said 20 euros, right ? I gave you 20, why are you giving me back 3 euros?" "Ahh... We have no beer!"

I went to apply to be an agent with MI6. "Is there anything we should know about ? Compromising photos of you snorting coke out of a rentboy's arse, this sort of thing ?..." "Absolutely not." "That's too bad, these days you'd be fasttracked for quick promotion."