Sickipedia

Son: Why is my sister called Teresa? Dad: Coz your mum loves Easter - it's an anagram Son: Thanks dad Dad: No problem Alan

We can learn a lot from history. Take today. I was watching Premier League classics on Sky Sports, Liverpool versus Man Utd from 1998 and discovered that Posh Spice takes it up the arse.

"What seems to be the problem?," asked the doc. "Well," I said, "the entrance to my arse is sore." "That's probably because you call it the entrance," he replied.

I went to go to the vagina museum but accidentally went in the building next door. The place was a shit hole.

I've only one thing to say about Caroline Flack. Necro up the shitter job. Dry.

When I was a young lad, my body was a temple. A lot of priests entered it.

Staring at my girlfriend's ring, I can't believe it took me months to pluck up the courage to finally ask the big question... "Can we try anal?"

I shit myself when a tramp jumped out of the bushes and threatened to rape me. It didn't stop him though.

Dear Deirdre. My boyfriend's a right dick! He told me the best cure for constipation was anal sex. I didn't believe him but after some persuasion, he talked me into it and I let him stick his big fat knob into my tiny little arsehole. He shagged me up the bum really hard then after a while, shot his muck, deep into my bowels. He's just rung me this morning saying he wants to try it again as he's still constipated. What should I do? Sharon of Essex

When i was a schoolboy which was a very longtime ago, I had this brilliant maths teacher. He used to make me stay behind after class, take me into the storeroom and show me how forty seven can go into thirteen. Ooooooh.