Sickipedia

I was playing golf with Daniella westbrook the other day, and I said to her "you've got a hole in one"!!! She said "no I didn't, my ball is over there" I said "I was talking about your nostrils"

Is Gabrielle's eye better?

I am looking forward to the new series of "I'm a Celebrity" when the contestants see Harry Rednapp in the flesh for the first time and think he is Falklands vet Simon Weston.

Before the famous singer/celebrity, e.g Sam Smith... announces; they are 'non-binary' or 'gender fluid'... I have usually already outed them in my mind as 'bland, boring cunt '+'

I'm not saying my dad is an Islamophobe but he told me that he wants to build a school inside a mosque. In America.

I had a friend who once was on Jim’ll fix it, he got to milk a cow blindfolded

I think my Siki account was hacked last night by Rebecca Vardy. See you in court potty mouth!

It's warm today but I didn't realise it was that warm, one of those wax dummies has a melted face. Oh nevermind, it's just Katie Piper!

Might not get deleted as a dupe because it's contemporary and true. I was just feeling nostalgic about my hero Pete Burns so I Googled "Dead Or Alive" The first hit is for an on-line Casino offering 50 free spins. Try it.

Teletubbies say, "Eh-Oh". Tinky-Winky says, "Ooh, fuck".