Sickipedia

An Amazon driver asked me the time.. I said " it's between 9am and 8pm".

I went to school with a bloke called Nicholas Girls. He's a photographer in the Porn Industry now.

Victoria Sponge. I went to school with her, she was soft, but very sweet.

There was this local Artist who did pictures of the Monkees. She captured Micky Dolenz teeth, Mike Nesmith's bobble hat and Davy Jones boyish good looks. Even her Pete Tork looked lifelike. Then I saw her trace. She's one big Deceiver!!! Stop that band wagon, I want to get on.

Great a new jab for H.I.V.!! What a shot in the arse !!!

In the News: Lenny Henry calls for reparations for black British people from White British people. That's one he'll of a roundabout way to get more alimony off of Dawn French.

I was sacked from the funeral home for playing The Mexican Hat Dance. Turns out the relatives wanted sombre music, not sombrero

🎶'It's nine o'clock on a Saturday The regular crowd shuffles in There's an old man sitting next to me Making love to his tonic and gin" 🎶 Make sure you give that glass a good wash then

Ian Watkins has been murdered in prison. Unfortunately, the knife was slightly injured.

Nigel Farage has made a statement after being called a bigot. "We accept anyone who is black, brown, trans, gay or normal".